Communicating with your teenager might be frustrating. You might not know the best way to go about it or what strategies to try. It`s important to remember that different things work for different families, so it is best to try different methods to see which one works for you.
Teenagers can be tricky. They are caught somewhere between being a kid and wanting to be an adult. However, with this age it can also bring defiantness, poor listening skills, impulsive behavior and decision making. Some teenagers run wild at this age; they may act out, not listen and seem to have no remorse or concern for their actions.
When teenagers are just doing minimal acting out, it is always advisable to have an open relationship with them. That means that you ensure there is time to talk and that you open yourself to it. Find periods of time during the day to bring up conversation. For example; making breakfast, or during dinner, find time to talk to your teenager. They may not tell you anything important, but just knowing that you are there to listen is a great first step to communicating.
Often the way adults approach teenagers can affect how the conversation is going to turn out. For example, if a parent is upset about something and storms into their teen`s room and starts accusing them of something, they may get defensive and mad. That is because teenagers sometimes feel that the whole world is against them and that nobody understands them.
To make your teenager not feel like they`re up against a wall, you should find an alternate way to talk to them. This could include giving your teenager some respect; you could knock on their door, and give them the benefit of the doubt. That means that you`re going to go into the conversation with an open mind. When your teenager can see that you`re not accusing and that you`re just talking to them, they might open and up and tell the truth.
If teenagers are doing some serious acting out and they are out of control, often there is not much that you can really do. You are not happy with the choices they are making, but the best thing to do is stand back and let your teenager learn from their mistakes. Often times, parents will complain that their teenagers are doing things that they don`t like and in response to it, they yell, scream, argue and take things away.
The only problem with giving out harsh punishment to a teenager, who is acting out to the extreme, is that they will likely only rebel further and the relationship between parent and child might become damaged. Often it is best to stop accusing, blaming and giving out punishment. Keeping an open relationship with your teenager is the ultimate way to stay connected while you both go through the stage in his/her life.
Try to remember that all teenagers go through that troubling teenaged time period. And while some teenagers may act out more than others, the important thing to remember is that the period of time is only short and temporary. That means that your teenage daughter will eventually become a wonderful human being again! If you can get through the short time period while keeping a good relationship going, then you will most likely not regret it in the future.
Roberto Sedycias works as IT consultant for Polomercantil.
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