Argue With Your Teenager

If you're like me, you put off getting your child a cell phone for as long as you could. Especially if you have teenage daughters and know how much time they spend on the phone. You can see yourself taking out a second mortgage just to pay the cell phone bill.

Of course, when they start going out and hanging out with friends, not to mention dating, there arise numerous scenarios wherein a cell phone might come in very handy. Thinking back to my own younger days and some of the situations I found myself in, having instant access to my parents would have been a very good thing.

One of the more recent debates concerning cell phone usage is whether or not teens should be allowed to carry their phones or iPads or whatever the latest incarnation is to school with them. There are certainly pros and cons to the subject.

Obviously the most beneficial use of a cell phone is for instant access to a parent in the event of an emergency. If a child becomes sick or needs to leave school for some other reason, it eliminates several steps that were previously needed to get in touch with the responsible parties.

Likewise if a child misses their bus home or if they become stranded somewhere. Some newer phones come equipped with GPS devices making it easy for parents to locate their children at any time.

In more extreme cases, such as recent events involving school shootings and other violence, cell phones were instrumental in helping police and other rescuers locate students hiding out in classrooms and closets.

Of course any technology can be used for nefarious purposes. Students have been known to take advantage of cell phone internet access to find test answers and use texting to communicate those answers to their friends. Such devices can also be used to facilitate the newer problem known as cyber bullying, where hurtful and offensive comments are sent to or posted about certain students. There have been documented cases of students committing suicide or other drastic acts based on problems with messages or texts sent through cell phone usage.

In addition, texting or net surfing can become a distraction from what is being done in class.

The newest and more disturbing trend in texting is known as sexting, where students send suggestive or even sexually explicit pictures of themselves to boyfriends or girlfriends. The problem is obvious enough, but amplified to the extreme once these pictures get out and are distributed (which they always inevitably will be). Teens need to be told several times over, that they should not put anything online that they are not prepared for the entire world to see. Once it is online, consider it gone. You will never get it back and it will always be on somebody's hard drive somewhere.

Cell phones may also inadvertently make children the targets of violent attacks, especially if their phone is one of the more expensive models. Being assaulted and robbed of such items is nothing new, and parents should think twice about sending their kids to school with the Cadillac phone when the Chevy version might be a better choice.

Of course some schools and states take the decision out of the parents' hands by banning cell phones altogether. This may seem like an extreme reaction to many, but this author would argue that previous generations grew up just fine without the benefit of cell phones in the classroom. In fact, it could be argued that as a result we had a healthier level of social interaction as a result of not being tied to Facebook and actually having to converse face to face.

On the other hand, as a parent with a child who has suffered from serious medical issues, I can also see the added benefit of the child having the ability to instantly communicate, especially at times where going through school channels to get access to a phone would prove problematic.

So which point of view is the right one? That is up to you to decide, based on your knowledge of your child, their behavior, and their level of responsibility. Handled the right way, technology is our friend. Handled the wrong way, it can become a serious problem. Make the determination that is right for you and your family.

For more on the subject, check out the following online debate.

Billy D. Ritchie
Director Of Content
Leadsbyfone, LLC
Billy is a freelance writer and Director of Content for Leadsbyfone LLC. Visit him online at his blog.

"I remember being a young teenager and fantasizing about what my life would be like in a few years, when I was old enough to hit the beach with my friends. Back then, I was obsessed with the idea of tanning because I wanted to get my body picture perfect for the day that I first slipped into a bikini and waded into the water with a co-ed group of friends. At the time, I asked my parents about using a tanning bed. They refused, for a number of reasons starting with the cost and continuing on in to health concerns.

I was a typical teenager so I begged and pleaded and argued and yelled. And then I finally gave up and realized that I wasn't going to be using a tanning bed at any time during my teenage years. But that didn't do anything to diminish my dreams of having the perfect tan in place for whenever I might finally make it to those co-ed beach parties. Instead, I took a towel out into the hot sun, climbed up on the roof and began to tan naturally. Of course, I didn't tan, I burned. But I was a teenager, and I was stubborn, and as soon as the burn had peeled away, I did it again. This was a consistent story throughout my teenage years.

Would I have benefited as a teenager for being allowed to use a tanning bed? Probably not if I'd been given free reign to use one at my leisure (say if we had gotten one for our own home). But, given the right supervision and education in tanning procedures, I probably would have harmed the health of my skin a lot less if I was using a tanning bed than I did by abusing the sun.

Here are some things to think about if you are the parent of a teenager who wants to use a tanning bed:

o Where there's a will, there's a way. Educating your kids about the dangers that are your cause for concern is always better than just banning a product.

o Proper use of tanning lotions and other tanning products increases the safety of indoor tanning. Taking your teenager to a salon that will provide this education could be a good step towards healthful tanning for the rest of his or her life.

o Improper exposure to UV rays is particularly damaging for youths and teens. A good tanning salon can moderate exposure. As a parent, you should always go to the tanning salon with your teenager (yes, she'll hate you for it now and yes, she'll thank you for it later). Explain your concerns to the salon and work out a proper tanning plan to make sure that only moderate UV radiation will occur.

o Educate yourself. The more that you know about the topic of tanning, the better equipped you are to assist your teenager when the topic comes up.

The fact is that teenagers often do what they want. If you, as a parent, try to ban the option of tanning beds then your teenager is likely to find some other way to get that tan. Open communication with your teenager about the reasons for wanting a tan and the proper procedures for doing so will go a long way towards protecting the health of your child's skin and improving your relationship."

Baxter Owens is the developer of TanTans.com, an ultra premium Tanning Bed Lotion website & vendor. TanTans.com offers premium tanning lotion at discount, wholesale prices. Visit TanTans.com today for all of your indoor tanning & skin care needs!

If you constantly find yourself in disagreement with your teenager because of the generation gap, parenting will be a frustrating experience. You must Learn Smart Parenting to have a harmonious relationship with your teenagers, and so you must learn to understand your teenagers.

The Following are 10 tips on dealing with your teenagers and understanding their way of thinking.

Your Role As A Parent And A Friend Must Be Clearly Defined.

You are father or mother to your child, and you should also be a friend to them. You need to make a distinction between being a parent and the same time a friend to your child. You cannot judge your child whenever they confide their problems to you, as friends often do. As parents, you cannot do this because of your care for the child.

Be Involved In Their Life, And Show It.

To be involved means you must find the time to be with them whenever you have any spare time, especially if you rarely have the time to be with your children because of your work commitments. They will find it easier to come to you when they are in trouble if you make a point of learning about their life, their thoughts and their feelings.

Teach Them To Be Accountable.

Provide them with an allowance but don't pay them if they are not doing their chores, as agreed, for their allowance. Prepare your child for adult life and teach them that if they want something, they must work in some way in order to achieve it. The important thing is not the money, it is being responsible and independent which matters. By doing this you will train them to survive in this world.

Be There When They Need You.

Always let them know that you are there for them and can and will provide support for them. This is your essential and should never be overlooked by any parent.

Tune In To Their World.

You should always be aware of their leisure time activities, know what type of music they like (and actually listen to it) and remember the names of their friends.

Listen To What They Are Saying.

Always listen to them so that you will get the message that they are trying to convey and try to understand what they want These messages often means they need your help.

Explain The Reasons For Your Decisions.

Your children will learn better decision making skills if you explain the reason that you made a certain decision. They may not always agree with your decision but they will see the reasons behind your thinking.

Sometimes You Should Be Ready To Bend The Rules.

You must have a set of rules but there are always exceptions to these rules and there are times when you should be flexible.

Share Your Interest And Find Out About Theirs.

You may never ever have common interests but by sharing interests you will learn together and will understand your children better.

Always Keep Talking Even If You Think Your Teen Is Not Listening.

Teenagers do listen to their parents. This is something you may not know because it seems they only want to argue with you. You may think they are not listening to what you are saying, but this is only for now. Never stop giving advise, the advise always sticks

Follow these tips on understanding your child and you will Learn Smart Parenting.

Check out [http://learnsmartparenting.com] to learn how to become a Smart Parent and prepare your children for their life the 21st century.

Helen Cadd